Music

Although my dream of being a professional singer started at age 4, elementary school music class kicked off my true love affair with music. Most of my classmates didn’t pay much attention in class, but I couldn’t get enough. I still have a stack of old report cards in a plastic tub somewhere, and they all talk about how much I loved music class.

In 5th grade, we were all invited to the cafeteria to try out different band instruments. I thought I would follow in my older sister’s footsteps and play the flute, but the universe had other plans. When I couldn’t seem to make a noise out of the flute, one of the teachers asked if I’d like to try the trumpet instead. The rest was history. Music became my new caretaker.

The Move to California

When I was thirteen, my parents decided to put our house up for sale and move to California. The house sold in one day, and we had 30 days to get out. We had never been west of the Mississippi River before, so we bought a 40-foot travel trailer and set out to adventure across the country. After six months of exploring, we settled in a charming beach town north of San Diego called Carlsbad, California. I didn’t know it yet, but this would be my new home for the next 25 years.

Throughout high school, I joined every musical group possible. I played in concert, marching, and jazz bands, percussion ensemble, the pit orchestra for spring and fall musicals, and an honor band for the top music students in the state. I even became the lead singer in a rock band. If I wasn’t playing music, I was busy ditching my other classes to go to the beach. Music and nature continued to be the only pursuits to soothe my troubled mind.

Self-Sabotage

I always thought I would follow my heart and continue down a path of doing what I love, but fear and self-doubt have a funny way of creeping in when we least expect it. I didn’t know it then, but my feelings of being unloved from when I was a kid kept me stuck. After graduating high school, I began a 20-year cycle of self-sabotage.

Instead of choosing my passion, I chose the safer path of getting a business degree. I continued ignoring the callings of my heart and allowed a temp agency to find me a job in the corporate world. Even though I wasn’t particularly fond of the work, I dedicated myself to being the best I could be at it. It wasn’t until much later that I realized my work ethic and people-pleasing tendencies stemmed from my childhood rejection and abandonment wounds. I desperately needed others to see me as worthy.

I continued to abandon myself in all of my relationships. I was a chameleon, becoming whoever it was that I thought someone else needed at the time. I never said no, and I depended on everyone else for guidance and insight into my life.

After a trail of failed relationships, I finally met a good man who didn’t take advantage of my people-pleasing tendencies. I knew for sure that this one wasn’t going to hurt me, so of course, I married him. We got along perfectly and had a happy marriage, but I continued to abandon myself. I never once stopped to think about what I wanted. I just wanted him to be satisfied so he would never want to leave me.

My Awakening

Between 2018 and 2020, I was struggling with a whole slew of health issues. I had been feeling sick for so many years that it became a regular part of life. I suffered from chronic migraines, joint pain, nausea, anxiety, depression, panic attacks, severe inflammation, insomnia, weight gain, digestive issues, and probably a hundred other ailments.

Things got particularly miserable when my gallbladder started to malfunction. For six months, I couldn’t eat without getting sick. I lost thirty-five pounds and was drinking Ensure to get enough nutrition to get out of bed. I continued to go to my stressful corporate job every day, and I was slowly wasting away. I became this shell of a person, just existing to get by.

I went to doctor after doctor, and no one could find anything wrong with me. They offered prescription drugs to mask the symptoms without even knowing what the issue was. I was frustrated with the lack of care and the cavalier approach to my long list of symptoms. I ended up having surgery to remove my gallbladder. After the surgery, I could eat again, but I still felt awful.

Out of desperation, I started exploring alternative medicine. I began seeing an acupuncturist who introduced me to multiple forms of energy work. I started learning about Reiki, sound healing, herbal and plant therapy, and crystal healing. This was when I discovered that my energy had been so far out of alignment for so long that it was making me sick.

The Law of Attraction

I had an epiphany one day about eight months after my gallbladder surgery. I was getting ready to go on a bike ride around the lake. It was particularly crowded that day, and I was getting anxious about riding my bike through the crowds.

Then suddenly, a thought came over me. What would happen if I just let go of the fear and hesitation and just enjoyed riding my bike through the crowd? I decided to experiment. 

I let go of the negative expectations and allowed myself to pass people without hesitation, assuming they would move out of my way. I decided to enjoy myself, and the most amazing thing happened.

It was like the entire trail opened up just for me. Large groups of people parted and allowed me to pass without issue. There wasn’t even a close call. No one cut me off or ran into me. People were making eye contact with me and smiling. At that moment, it dawned on me – holy crap, I’m making this happen with my energy! I had heard of the Law of Attraction before, but it finally clicked for me at this moment. 

This shift in perspective completely changed my whole outlook on life. I was no longer a victim. I could create my reality. Adverse experiences weren’t happening to me. I was creating them with the negative frequency I was broadcasting to the world around me. This change in perspective allowed me to create an entirely different life for myself.

The Destruction of My Old Life

Once I realized that everything in my life was a choice, I decided to start making some changes. I began saying no to things I didn’t want to do. I started setting healthy boundaries for myself. I stopped abandoning myself to please others. That’s when things in my life started to fall apart to come back together.

My life needed to fall apart because I hadn’t been choosing any of it. All of the things in my life were a byproduct of me rejecting what my heart was calling me to do all along. For the first time, I was listening to my intuition, and it was telling me pretty much everything in my life had to change.

I started listening to my inner voice and taking care of myself. I meditated, asked myself what I needed, and then listened until the answers came. I started cutting out anything that wasn’t making me happy.

As the first big step, my inner voice led me to abandon my side business selling real estate. The rest fell like dominos. My husband and I decided to get a divorce, we sold our house in California, I quit my stressful corporate job, and I decided to move to Tennessee to start a new business and a new life. As devastating as it was, I knew in my soul that I was making room for something new by letting go of everything that was no longer serving me.

Finding My Purpose

As far as energy work is concerned, I went in skeptical and came out a believer. For the first time in a very long time, I started to feel better. After decades of dealing with imbalances in my body that made me sick, energy work finally allowed my body to heal.

I drastically improved my health and well-being by learning to clear out negative energy in my body. I was finally able to release decades of pent-up emotional trauma that kept me from living the life I knew I was meant to live. Once I detoxed the stagnant energy, I could finally regain my energy balance. And so, the next chapter of my life began.

Through my search to heal my mind, body, and spirit, I found my purpose in guiding others through a similar journey to holistic health and wellness. I am passionate about helping people clear and balance their energy, so they can finally live the life they were always meant to live.